The Proper Way to Indulge

Here’s something that drives me mad. I’m watching the Real Housewives of New York last night (Yes. I know that is crap. Yes. I watch it on Thursday On Demand instead of when it airs on Wednesday because my daughter needs me bedside every night until she is asleep which is usually around 8 and that’s just the way it is.) ANYWAY, I’m watching RHONY and they are in Mexico on this insane girls trip sponsored by Skinnygirl and they are taking turns getting massages on the beach and they are TALKING, nonstop, with animation, while getting a massage. on the beach.

What in the what?

I’m sorry, but you do not talk during a massage. You shouldn’t even really be thinking. You should not be prioritizing to-do lists or running through all the other things you could be getting done right now or who said what about who. The ONLY thing on your mind, if anything at all, should be, “holy moly. that feels good. zzz….”


What I look like walking into any spa anytime anywhere. (PupCup by Yoshitomo Nara. One of my favorite things)


I get massages twice a year. They come in the form of gift cards from Mike on my birthday and Mother’s Day, which usually take me three months or more to cash in. In other words, as excited as I am to receive such a generous gift, I am the stereotypical busy busy mom who does not take time for herself. I forget to shower, I rarely put on makeup and I often sleep in the shirt I wore that day AND THEN walk my daughter to school in it the next morning. In other words, sort of a martyr. I will fall on the sword for you, my family!

But this summer has brought revelations. Thora is 6 now and yes, she needs me there at bedtime, but otherwise, this is a pretty self-sufficient person I have here. Like right now, I am writing this and she’s in the living room jamming out to YouTube, mic in hand. She no longer requires a constant sacrifice from me. Actually, it’s better for her that I take care of myself. So I get that now and I’m trying. And the first order of business was to cash in that gift card from Mother’s Day. In August, but whatever. And that’s just what I did.

My card was for Spa Sweet here in Minneapolis. And while Mike’s intent was for me to get a massage, Spa Sweet specializes in skin care. I’ve never had a facial and the thought of someone rubbing my face for 60 minutes was intriguing. Plus, I’m turning 43 next month and I’ve been noticing some ramifications of my lack of proper skin care. There are wrinkles that won’t go away, sagging (!!) and my skin just looks different overall. My face forces me to deal with aging and I wanted to try to get on that before it’s too late. So a facial it was.

Important to point out, I had to make my appointment twice. On my first attempt Thora woke up sick. Because she couldn’t go to summer school, I couldn’t go to my facial. The sacrifice doesn’t end! Luckily they rescheduled me without fee and I went this past Wednesday. Totally worth the wait.

This is not a review of Spa Sweet, which was awesome. Nikita’s facial was a dream and I will be back. They also said the masseuse on staff will blow me away, so that’s on the list. This is about really experiencing that facial. A facial or a massage, is a luxury that some people do often (as I imagine the Housewives do), some (like myself) do so rarely, and others never get to do at all. I will always appreciate the opportunity, I will be silent and I will absorb and afterwards, as I’m injected back into my busy day, I will try to maintain the level of calm it brought me for as long as possible.

So it’s Friday and I’m still riding that high. I have washed my face every day and am using my new night moisturizer (that I bought with a discount. Always with a discount). I’m thinking about peptides, because I’ve been told they might help my furrowed brow. The wrinkle between my eyebrows is my soldier on the frontline. I’m looking down the barrel of 43 with the intention of caring for myself, appreciating what I have and being silent when I should be.



I make no endorsements here because as I said, I have not been kind to my skin in any sort of regular fashion. But this is what’s in the medicine cabinet now and what I am hoping will save me from the inevitability of time.

Left to right:
Rhonda Allison – Mandelic Arginine Serum (my new product for all the healing!)
Dr Dennis Gross – All-in-one Cleanser with Toner
Dr Dennis Gross – Ferulic Acid + Retinol Brightening Solution
Dr Dennis Gross – Ferulic Acid + Retinol Anti-Aging Moisturizer
Dr Dennis Gross – Ferulic Acid + Retinol Triple Correction Eye Serum
Perricone MD – Chloro Plasma (doing this tonight!)

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